Maia Kobabe’s Book was the Most Challenged Book in 2021 & 2022. Will “Gender Queer” still be on the list for 2023?
Why was “Gender Queer” Challenged at Our School?
A group of well-meaning parents challenged this book on Salt Spring Island not because it is LGBTQ+ (according to the posts) but because it contains what they deem to be ‘pornographic’ content.
The challenge started on Facebook through a post by an anonymous parent. It was then subsequently taken to the Gulf Islands Secondary School Administration, the SD64 school board, and the Parent Advisory Council. The post was a series of screenshots from a website called ‘BookLooks’, which is touted as being for the busy parent on-the-go who doesn’t have time to read all the books.
BookLooks launched in 2022 and uses a rating system approved by right-wing activist group “Moms for Liberty.” The website states that the creators do not support the banning of books.
In less than 2 years, BookLooks became THE go-to resource for anyone seeking to ban books - especially books about sexuality, gender, and the LGBTQ+ community. In Virginia, one school district has adopted the site as an official reference tool for vetting its library books.
When did we stop trusting the expertise of librarians who are trained to select books for our schools?
Why “Gender Queer” Needs to Stay on The Shelf.
What frightens me, and quite frankly should frighten all of us, is that websites like BookLooks take away our agency to be discerning. When we rely on screenshotted content taken by someone else, we unquestioningly accept a truth that resides well out of context without giving the book our full attention. We allow someone else to 'do the work' to decide what benefits kids.
We should NEVER accept someone else's opinion without doing our research and analysis. I credit my women's studies professor, Debby Yaffe, for teaching me this.
We can disagree with how someone tells their story and the type of content they choose to talk about to shape their narrative. Still, we should ask ourselves what we disagree with and why.
If I were to write a memoir about my teen years and my early experiences with identity and heterosexual sexuality (before I came out as queer), it would be essential for me to talk about the activities that I engaged in that I, at the time, thought would increase my opportunities for love, belonging and acceptance. Why? Because context is all. Through some of those activities, I came into complete contact with emotions, telling me that what I was doing was not wrong. Still, I was in that place, at that time, with that guy for all the wrong reasons.
Suppose I were to write this memoir and talk about my early sexual experiences with heterosexual relationships. Would it end up in BookLooks for pornographic content? Maybe, maybe not. If my honest portrayal of what it means to be a teen cis-girl navigating identity and heterosexual sexuality in the 1980s were challenged, then I would question why it is that we celebrate books with violence, child abuse, and murder (“Harry Potter”) as part of the narrative. At the same time, we are unable to have honest conversations about sexuality. Heck, I already do question this. I loved the “Hunger Games” series as much as the next kid, but are we seriously OK with reading about and watching teens murder each other? Why aren’t we OK talking about consensual, respectful sexual experiences? (BTW: Neither “Harry Potter” nor “Hunger Games” are listed on the BookLooks Website as containing inappropriate content.)
And I’m not advocating that either of these books be challenged. What I am advocating for is that we talk about ALL the hard things, including honest conversations about healthy sexual activity.
I can guarantee you that most cis-gendered straight kids are engaging in sexual activities. Through their investigation of sexuality and their navigation of relationships, they are figuring out who they are. They are developing a sense of identity. And, if they are cis-gendered girls, they are - yes, EVEN in 2024 - navigating what it means to be a girl and engage in a heterosexual sexual relationship within the context of a world that still favours cis-boys and where many cis-boys still get information about sex from pornography and where sexism and misogyny still have traction. The soul-crushing eradication of Roe v. Wade did not take into consideration the human rights of humans with uteruses.
In 2023, when “Gender Queer” was challenged across the pond, the Australian Classification Board made this statement:
“....the content of the publication is justified in context, is appropriate for its intended audience of people who are interested in the author or the subjects of gender identity and asexuality, and has a positive tone and character as well as many layers of positive messaging.” (The Guardian, July 21, 2023)
“Gender Queer” is such a phenomenal book. Maia Kobabe wrote and illustrated a graphic novel with an honest and open presentation of what it means to be nonbinary and asexual. We need more books like this because they invite kids to pay attention to what they are feeling and to question the world around them, which demands a kind of conformity that is damaging to one’s mental health. It invites kids to embrace who they are. Heck, I think a lot of cis-gendered, straight kids could benefit from asking questions about how they feel and whether or not they need to conform to the rigid gender binary. And, news flash, some cis-gendered people who once thought they were attracted to the opposite gender do realize that they are asexual.
Kabobe writes: “As I pondered a pronoun change, I began to think of gender less as a scale and more as a landscape. Some people are born in the mountains, while others are born by the sea. Some people are happy to live in the place they were born, while others must make a journey to reach the climate in which they can flourish and grow. Between the ocean and the mountains is a wild forest. That is where I want to make my home.” p.191, “Gender Queer”
Kobabe writes about eir exploration of identity and sexuality and unravels what it means to be nonbinary - to feel neither male nor female. Eir journey covers confusion about gender and sexual identity, secondary sex characteristics (such as breasts) and menstruation, confusing sexual encounters, pronouns, masturbation, and sexual fantasies. Kobabe's story is presented in a charming, sincere way with respect and attention to consensual relationships.
As with other challenged LGBTQ+ books, Kobabe's book has been criticized as not excellent teaching material and intended for grooming. Once again, may I remind us all that the concept of grooming is homophobic and rooted in fear. Queer people do not recruit. They, just like their cis-gendered, straight friends, want to get good grades, have friends, read books, get a good job, buy a house, adopt too many cats, bake cakes, host BBQs, and have families. And, there are enough LGBTQ+ people that we can find someone to fall in love with (if we even want to be in a romantic relationship) without 'converting' a straight person.
If we want to talk about grooming, let's turn on the Disney channel, shall we? Nothing grooms little cis-girls faster than a Disney princess narrative. And this is coming from someone who is a discerning fan.